How am i crEAting disconnection?

It felt like there was a ticking time bomb and I needed to choose sides. I was in the middle, deeply connected to both sides, they both made me sad, they both made me happy, they both made me angry and loved, which side do I choose? I closed my eyes, taking deep breaths and my soul spoke in a language unfamiliar to the human ear; it was a feeling. If I were to articulate and express in words this message of vibration from my soul, it said, “create a bridge where you can remain connected to both and help build a neutral side so that others can see both sides”.
True Human Nature
I never truly understood my empathetic nature to its true core. It’s not just in my nature but every human’s nature, we all share this love for community. We all desire to be seen but most importantly, we want to see the creation of a movement as a whole and coming together like a symphony. Call it family, call it friendship or your ride or die-gang but we all desire to beam in a group. If we are all connected, when did we start to disconnect and form cliques?
Suppressing Our Truth
As we grow from a child, to a teen and to adulthood, we are presented with several narratives chosen for us depending on our “cliques” like culture, ethnic group, sex orientation, family, country etc. We start to instill this idea that we MUST choose a belief and surround ourselves with that same likeliness of people. We instill this indirect message that we must plant these roots and commit to that opinion or idea. We don’t realize that we suppress what lives in the soul, and it’s this longing to express uniquely while at the same time, love the diversity of the lights expressed in the orchestra we are a part of.
Unified Sound
I was in band for many years, I started playing the alto saxophone at the age of 7 all the way through senior year in high school. As I write this, I am shown of a beautiful truth about community, and that community is like a band. They all have different parts of a song, even those that are playing the same instrument and with that, they all have sub-practices that then prepare us for a practice with the whole band. These practices come full circle. For example, you practice first as a whole, then in the instrument group and lastly by yourself so that you can then practice back in your instrument group and then practice as a whole again. The purpose for this is to be responsible for your own individual sound so that you can bring the best version of your sound to your same instrument group that then part take in a bigger responsibility to the band to play together. You witness the beauty of coming together and bringing your best expression to one whole expression, because this is the true purpose of the band, to have a variety of different unique expressions in one unison vibration.
Diminishing Disconnection
Among many of our truths, one of them is that we are all connected, which brings forth the desire to be empathetic. If you strip away all the competitive ideas that the world has instilled in us, we find this pure truth to be aware of the sounds that don’t sound like ours. Listening to the narratives that we can relate to and also listening to the ones that we can gain broader awareness from. Empathy diminishes disconnection because it diffuses anger, offense, judgement and leaves us feeling undeserving of taking love away from people we thought didn’t deserve it.

Through the navigation of your life, I invite you to connect to this truth when you ever feel tension that tempts you to classify anyone to be undeserving of love and peace.

Love and peace be with you
-Victoria GOLD