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I was so happy December was here! I wanted all the Christmas adventures, traditions and profound meanings of this Season. I was so joyful to get started on all of it and at the end of my day, I decided to watch a Christmas movie. Once the movie ended, I felt so incredibly lonely. At that moment i wasn't too sure where it was coming from so I decided to watch another movie to change my mood. I skimmed through the rest of the holiday movie options and I was stunned by the fact that 95% of the holiday movies were about Romantic-love.
What have we done to Christmas?
Are we making this the loneliest time of the year?
I observed this feeling of anxiety come over me when I thought of my single-status over the holidays. I thought to myself, “Why am I feeling this way after this movie? I didn’t feel this way about my singleness before”. I sat there curious about the other holiday movies and as I watched the previews I noticed that the MAJORITY of the movies revolved around someone being single and lonely. Movies like, “Love Hard”, “The Knight Before Christmas”, “Holiday In The Wild”, “The Holiday Calendar”, “Holidate”, ”My Dad’s Christmas Date”, “Single All the Way”, the list goes on and on! The storylines of these movies were all the same, they were based around the idea that they must find romance during the holidays and to our surprise, the director makes sure that the movie ends with them finding it. All the singles in these holiday movies weren’t portrayed as someone who was secure and fulfilled, it all showed them depressed, desperate and heart broken. It’s no wonder people feel the loneliest during the holidays! USA Today stated, “The busiest day of the year for online dating is the 5th of January” (https://www.usatoday.com/tech/). The world is influencing our idea of what it means to be single during the holidays. Filling our mind with the idea that you can’t enjoy the holidays UNLESS you “find romance”.
Are we losing sight of Christmas?
I had to really take a step back after seeing this pattern in movies. I decided to clean and decorate so I put some Christmas music on. Aware of the influence in movies, it didn’t come to a surprise when I witnessed the same influence in music. Songs like, “All I want for Christmas is you”, “Under the mistletoe”, “Santa tell me”, “Christmas without you” etc. All of it revolved around fantasizing Romance during the holidays. At this point you may think, “So what?!”. Then I ask you, does it not make you sad? Does it not sadden you that we have made that a primal focus of Christmas? Letting the world get clouded and lose sight of the true meaning of Christmas.
I promise you that Romantic-love isn’t about Christmas. Romantic-love happens all year round when we are in alignment for it. Whether you believe in Jesus Christ or not, Christmas is about his birth. Before you disregard this whole blog because you don’t follow him, at least honor what he stood for if you choose to celebrate Christmas. He stood for what MANY people stand for despite religion, and that is, Agape Love. Agape Love is an unconditional, self-sacrificing love that is said by many spiritual leaders to be above all other “types” of love. Jesus’ birth is a story of perseverance, sacrifice, humility, service and so much more. If you enjoy the traditions that have been inspired through Christmas, all I ask is that you welcome Agape love, if anything else, make Christmas about that.
How do you make Christmas about that?
Initiate servanthood and help a friend, a stranger; someone in need. Truly serve someone who needs your love because acts of kindness are pretty but acts of serving someone in need are life changing. Look for an absence of love and be the one to bring love in that absence. That space can either be a home, work, person and even nature. You also make Christmas about it when you persevere for someone else. Who needs hope around you to help them persevere? One of my favorites is Humility through forgiveness and apology. Who do you need to forgive? Who do you need to apologize to? Another one of my favorites is Unity. Is there anywhere you can fill a gap to unite people? Maybe someone needs encouragement to unite with their family. Maybe it’s time for you to create unity through a cause? All of these beautiful initiations can start to bring back the true meaning of Christmas.
P.S. You are not lonely during this season, you have just become distracted by the influence of the world and it’s time to refocus. Peace and love be with you!
Love, Victoria GOLD
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